Uff yeh Feelings 9
Pihu replied, “No not at all. In fact I don’t understand how I should thank you. It’s so sweet of you to say all this, someone can love her so much, and all her irritating things can be cute for someone. I am so glad a person like you loves her Arnab. Thank you for being there for her. But it’s not easy, I don’t know when she will understand this and will she ever come out of her ‘first teenage love’ and see your love for her and fall for it.
His smile broadened, Pihu continued, “Can I ask you one more thing? You know her feelings, her craze for Tarun, won’t it affect your love? Can you accept it without feeling bad about it?”
He looked at her but remained quiet. Pihu thought she had asked a wrong question and was about to apologize when Arnab replied,
“That is what keeps my hopes high. If she can love someone so much who never loved her in return, how deeply will she love someone who loves her back? Once she will accept my love, I promise, she will forget about Tarun and move on.” Pihu was amused at his confidence, she even felt good that he is exactly the kind of person Isha deserves.
“So, Dr. When are you going to propose her?” she asked with a smile.
He replied getting sad, “I don’t know, I am scared that she will reject me and I may lose her friendship too.”
“You know what Arnab you are repeating the same mistake Isha did in Tarun’s case. She kept her feelings to herself and see now what conditioned she had reached in her life. Promise me, tomorrow is Diwali, and you will propose her tomorrow, no matter what her answer be, promise me.”
He kept quiet for a while thinking about the pros and cons and then replied “Ok I promise.”
She gave her an assuring smile, he felt better. She asked him to come along her to check Isha once.
They both kept walking slowly and as they both entered and saw Isha reading her diary with tears in her eyes,
“Who brought it here?” she asked.
“Sorry baby, I bought it, I wanted to know what was wrong with you, must have written it in your diary so I bought it here.” Pihu said, she really wanted to know what happened with her that day.
There was an uneasy silence for a while; Isha got tears in her eyes.
Arnab when to her and wiped her tears, “Its ok if you don’t want share, its ok, tell us later.”
She asked for water, he handed her the glass. After taking few sips she said,
“I think I should talk about it now. I want to take it out of my head, its haunting me, I need you both to listen and don’t interrupt me, don’t come to me to wipe my tears if I cry. Just completely listen to me first, I want to get rid of those memories, promise me you both will not judge me after it?”
They both said “yes” and sat down on the nearby sofa. She began.
“I just took stairs out of my office and switched on my cell and got a text from Tani and I started reading it. As I was stepping down towards the basement parking, I got to know Tarun and Tani were getting engaged soon, it made me numb for a while. I reached my car and sat in, for few seconds I lost my thinking capacity. I just didn’t wanted to drive back home, I didn’t wanted to go anywhere actually. Suddenly a group of my colleagues and subordinate approached me, they asked me if I would join for a weekend ‘chill-out’ session. They had asked me many times before but I had just gone once and didn’t like the atmosphere as they all got high and drunk. So after that day, I never went with them but today, I accepted it as a welcoming change and said ‘yes’ to their invitation. Then the girls in the group entered in my car and all the boys took their own cars and we headed towards the night club. I just wanted to keep that thought (Tani- Tarun-wedding) away from my mind; I wanted to relax, to enjoy. For the first time in life, I got drunk. Initially, I didn’t like it. First shot burned my throat, then after 2 shots I started to enjoy myself, I was feeling lighter and better and I scolded myself for not doing it before. I started to laugh and enjoy. We danced, we drunk and got more drunk. I was high but I could feel few of the boys getting touchy with me during dance but I didn’t mind it, I just wanted to free myself from ever defined limits that day.
At about 3 am, I started feeling dizzy and sleepy. I told my group I wanted to go back home, nobody was in mood to. I was not in a condition to drive, I requested a friend to drop me back. She was busy with her boyfriend and was not in mood to so she asked another guy (whom I didn’t knew) to drop me back. I agreed, she told him my address. I badly wanted my home that time. We left, he kept on talking during the drive, I didn’t hear any of it though. After sometimes, our car halted, and 3 more guys entered. I was too drunk to understand anything. He kept on driving and finally reached my building. The gate keeper didn’t allow the car to enter, at first but when I shouted at him, he recognized me and let them in.
The guy asked me, ‘which floor?’ and I pushed the button of my floor in the lift. He was holding me from my waist to avoid me from fall. As I reached my flat, I went straight to the living room and fell on the couch. I slept in no time as I was hell exhausted. After few minutes, I started to feel uneasy in my sleep, I tried to open my eyes with lo of struggle and then I saw one of the guy was trying to remove my dress and rest three of them were standing surrounding me. From the looks on their faces I could make out that all of them wanted to hurt me, to satisfy their desires. I got back to my senses as I realized the reality and started to shout and asked them to leave my house. They didn’t listen to me, one of them slapped me hard, one of them pulled my hairs and I started begging them for my life. They didn’t listen to me Pihu they didn’t.” Isha started to cry loudly.
Pihu and Arnab were staring at her, shell shocked. Pihu was having tears in her eyes and Arnab was filled with anger, Pihu started to move towards her, Isha stopped her with a gesture of her hand, she didnt wiped her tears, just let them flow and continued.
“I struggled a lot, they were acting like wild animals with me, they pushed me hard as I tried to run, I reached my bedroom but they reached there too, grabbing me and throwing me on the bed. I was trying to stand up but they didn’t let me. I can’t describe how pathetic I was feeling; a girl always dreams of first kisses and first male touches to be romantic & sweet memories she will cherish all her life, but with me it didn’t happened. I never want to remember all that, it was all so forceful I was begging them to leave me. I gave up finally and closed my eyes but suddenly images of my mom dad appeared. Tears started flowing from my eyes, I could not let those four bastards take away my parents pride, their princess from them. With all the power and force I had, I just stood up over bed and look towards my left. Luckily, it was an open window and without even thinking for a second, I just jumped off. It was neither an accident not any suicide attempt, it was my way of saving my dignity.” she started crying like a baby, she groaned, she screamed, tears came dripping from her face.
Pihu wanted to console her, Arnab stopped her, “let it come out, she had suffered a lot” Her weeps increase, her voice got heavier, she let it happen for few minutes, many nurses and people gathered on the door of her ward, due to her cries. Dr. Arnab gestured them to go away, he stood and closed the door. When he turned he saw Pihu and Isha hugging each other, he joined them. Three of them held each other in embrace and cried. Pihu was rubbing her back, wiping away her tears to calm her. After a while she calmed down, her eyes turned red, they were swollen, Arnab gave her a glass of water, Pihu got up, took a napkin and wet it with water, she then wiped Isha’s face with it, she kissed her forehead, tied her hairs, held her hand and whispered, “I am so proud of you Ishu and love you so much. You are the strongest girl I have ever seen.”
Isha smiled faintly, she felt better now, Pihu looked at Arnab, he was crying and walked away towards the window. She whispered to Isha pointing towards Arnab, “I have never seen a guy crying out for a girl like this. This guy loves you a lot, like a baby. Give yourself another chance Ishu please.”
Isha looked at him and looked back at Pihu again; she couldn’t believe her at first but later when she stressed her mind she knew Pihu was speaking the truth. Then after a while she said “I know, his care for me is more than a friend’s care and I don’t want to hurt him, he has been so good to me. So before I am sure about my feelings, I need sometime only then I can give him my 100%.” Pihu hugged her, she was so happy to hear it. She then went to Arnab, and asked him not to cry, “Go to her, she needs you.”
“I can’t face her, I am such an idiot, why was I not there when so much happened with her? I was here, performing an operation that night, how pathetic; I was saving someone else’s life when my own life was in danger.”
“Hey don’t take it this way, may be you saved a life that’s why God saved YOUR LIFE, your Isha.”
To Be Continued..
Will Arnab propose to Isha? Will Isha accept his love? What will happen next? Check out 10th and final episode of the story Uff Yeh Feelings next Wednesday.
A lot like love talks about tales knit around various emotions and centre of which is love and related feelings of attachment, friendship, hope and other delicacies. Column is being published every Wednesday on BuddyBits.com.