Have you ever been in a situation when you really needed the other person to understand and agree with you, but you couldn’t do it? Well, the art of persuasion is no facile job. Here are some ways you can make people agree with you and get what you need!
1. Never argue!
9 out of 10 arguments end in disaster leaving a person thinking that he is right no matter what. Never think only you are right. Just listen to what another person is trying to say and try to have a look from his perspective. Who knows what will you get to know when you see that way. How exciting! Whatever it may be, it will be unknown to you and knowing it will only add to your knowledge. The art of selling your opinion is not in how good of an argument you can make. So, never argue. You can never ever change a person’s standpoint by an argument but you’ll only piss them off more!
2. Make friends rather foes!
Be immensely humble and loving when you speak! Never even mistakenly say something like “I wanna prove to you”. It will come off as offensive and mean that you think you are wiser than the other person and you don’t at all respect him. You’ll only raise walls for yourself which will emotionally disconnect you from the other person whom you are trying to persuade! Trying to change a man’s will is a tough nut to crack and is hardly possible. If you wanna change someone’s heart, do it skilfully and lovingly and he will be loyal to you forever!
3. Accept your mistake
Be colossally humble, admit accept your omissions and avow you were wrong if you really are. It takes a lion’s heart to admit you were erroneous and not everyone can do it! If you try to defend your mistake, you’ll look fatuous, but if you accept it, the satisfaction you’ll feel is peerless!
4. Sway them with politeness
If you go charging against people in order to convince them, they will charge back at you with double the force! But, if you go with a broad smile on your face and tell them that you need to understand their interpretation and sort out the differences over a coffee, they will give you a broad smile back with double the emotions! Getting irate attracts more anger and results in more enmity of your opinions. Just assure them that you are not their enemy and off you go! The humbler you’ll be, the better response you’ll get!
5. Remember Socrates?
You should never jump into an ongoing conversation of which you have no knowledge at all. You should always discuss about the things you know thoroughly and thus, avoiding any misunderstanding. Try starting off with the obvious facts so that the other person agrees with you on every step of the conversation. Avoid giving the other person a chance to say no or to refuse to abide with you. Socrates used to ask questions of which the answers would be in a positive manner. Then at last after few questions, he used to ask the question of which he wanted the answer to be ‘yes’, and he got that everytime!
6. Never complain!
Never complain of something you cannot do. That will only make you look weak and weepy! Face the difficulties as challenges and always be positive! Also, when a person speaks, never interrupt, let him finish no matter how long it takes. If you try to prove your worth higher than the others, you’ll make enemies and if you let others prove their worth higher than you, you’ll make friends!
7. Get cooperation and willingness.
No matter what you think, always make the other person feel that the idea was actually proffered by him. if you want their cooperation just ask for it by saying something like “Will you help me achieve it?” People never really like when they are sold something out of the blue or when they are asked to do something against their will. But, only if you make them feel that they want it and that the thing you are selling will make a change in their lives, they’ll overjoyed to buy it from you!
8. Understand their perspective
It can be that you are wrong and it also can be that the other person is wrong. There is a reason the other person is saying or behaving in that certain way. So, never criticize or belittle him. A genius, skillful, patient and a wise man would never do that. Because by doing this, he will make himself a grave. Try and understand what the other person is saying and very politely ask him to make you understand in detail if you fail to get it more than once. Arguments can never drive away the misunderstandings, but understanding the other person’s viewpoints and putting your opinions likewise will!
9. Give them what they want.
People usually love to be proved right and love to hear you agree with them. So, do agree with them. Say that you hear what they are saying and they are absolutely right. If you say this much, you will win their hearts and also send a message that you are not their enemy and are open to suggestions and do things according to others’ ideas. People crave for sympathy and assurance too. Whenever you start a sentence, say something like “it is not your fault for following the religion you follow. You are doing it right because that’s what your parents have taught you. I would have done the same if I was in your shoes.” This way you acknowledge them and keep them happy!
10. Always smile
Keep smiling always! When you smile, you give out an unconscious trigger to the minds of other which make them smile in return. It also bounds them to smile back making them think that if they don’t, it will be rude. 9 out of 10 time you’ll get a smile back even when you smile at complete strangers! Smile is the best thing you can do to break the ice! You can follow up with a warm casual conversation right after a smile because then, the awkwardness will won’t affect your conversation! So, smile away fellas!