As the rest of the nation is alien to the internal rifts in several parts of Gujarat, the state is gearing up for a major war this week. With just 2 days to go for Makar Sankranti, Gujjus are leaving no stone unturned to make their “Kai Po Che” revelry memorable! As fever of the kite festival engulfs the state, here is a list of 21 things that you can expect this Uttarayan.
1. Bird watching
When people throng the terraces, it is but obvious that they will bird-watch. However, on the 14th and 15th January, terraces turn into a fashion ramp and bird-watching refers to stalking that hot guy/ girl on the neighbouring terraces. Yes, it’s all about wooing them with your kite-flying skills and deceptive looks.
2. Collect kites
No matter how rich Gujjus are, the greedy person in them will never forgo the unmanned kite that comes their way.
3. Collect thread
Gujju logic: “Patang looti lidha, have dori shodho ane lachha banavo.”
4. Unmanned kites getting entwined
The most frustrating thing on the day of Uttarayan is “Bey kapayelo patang bharai gayo”.
5. Terrace fights
Amidst the shouts of “lappet”, the skies get filled with “Ghelsappa”, “Lakhota”, “Chu****” as the tension builds! Expect a few brawls this Uttarayan, and try not to be a part of one.
6. Undhiyu
We will have undhiyu in breakfast. In lunch. In dinner.
7. Crackers
Since it is Uttarayan, we will also celebrate the day by bursting the leftover crackers of Diwali.
8. Garba
We just need an excuse to do garba, and these loudspeakers on the terraces are too good to not play garba tracks! And oh, Raees has a garba track, so haaaaaaaaalo…
9. Lanterns
Although the “Chinese balloons” are banned in Gujarat, the night sky gets “lit af”!
10. Raipur Patang Bazaar
If you’re in Ahmedabad the night before Uttarayan, visit Raipur Darwaza to experience the problem of overpopulation in India.
11. Vasi Uttarayan next day.
“15 mi ni alag raja nai male” – every employer, ever.
12. Slit fingers
Uttarayan is no less than a war, and Gujjus turn warriors during the two days of revelry. It’s not until 16th January that a Gujju with cuts on his/her fingers realises that shit just got serious!
13. Tanning
The fairness cream and sunblock manufacturers can never thank Uttarayan enough for shooting up their sales!
14. Kite flying at night
Just when you think that the day is over, white- and yellow-coloured kites dominate the dark skies.
15. Masks, horns, caps, sunglasses
Uttarayan is more than just kite-flying. Don’t be surprised to see people wearing ghost masks and designer hats as Bollywood tunes hit the skies during this extravaganza.
16. Tukkal
Once the parachutes vanish, the skies get filled with various kinds of lanterns.
17. Raees kites
Be it a Baniya or a Miyaanbhai, everyone in Gujarat loves flying kites. With Raees, a Gujarat-based movie, slated to release later this month, we can expect a lot of Raees kites soaring high in the skies.
18. Kite cutting on the same terrace
For once, you can digest a betrayal in a relationship, but if your friend from the same terrace cuts your kite, the scars will outrun every pain that exists!
19. Crowded food places
Well, food, festival and Gujarat, need I say more?
20. Kite catchers on the streets
No matter how much you hate them for running all over the streets to catch kites with poles, you’ll buy “kinya bandhela” kites only from them on the big day.
Wishing you all a happy and a safe Uttarayan!
